The Writer's Voice
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Changes of Life
By
Elisa Berman
The car collected $200 as it passed 'go.' I could hear the car's engine
zooming around the board. Well, I almost heard it. I was playing Monopoly
with my brother. I just stared at him thinking how great life is, how great
spring break was going to be, and how great summer would be. I was absolutely loving life for the first time in a long time.
As you know, Monopoly is a long game. My family and I had about 5 or 6 hours till we had to go to the Northeast to my uncle's house for Passover
dinner. My brother and I were excited because we were going to see our aunt's
mother and son, whom we don't see too often. Monopoly was the best idea we
had to keep us busy for all that time.
Unfortunately we didn't get too far into the Monopoly. When the phone rang it interrupted my second turn. I was sitting next to the phone, so I
picked it up. I didn't even have a chance to finish saying hello before I
heard my grandmother's voice. In a sad voice she said "Elisa put your mother
on the phone." I could tell by the tone in her voice something was wrong, so
I handed the phone right to my mother. She didn't have to tell me what was
wrong. In the short time they were on the phone, I put all the pieces together. My grandmother was at the Saunder's house (the nursing home my
grandfather was in) visiting my grandfather. There was only one thing that
would upset her that much. It was the one thing everyone dreaded.
My grandfather had passed away. He had been sick for a long time. As a matter of fact he had been sick all my life. It wasn't till about 3 or 4
years ago that it became so serious. He has been in and out of the hospital
over those last few years. My family and I visited him almost every day, every time he was in the hospital. Even though my family was expecting this,
it struck us so suddenly. My grandmother was with him when he passed away.
She was hanging up the phone with my mother when she saw him take his last
breath. She didn't know it was his last breath till after she turned back
around and he wasn't breathing at all. She ran down the hallway to find a
nurse. Once the nurse confirmed it, my grandmother got right on the phone to
call my mom and uncle.
I had loved my grandfather dearly. I wanted everyone to know how much I loved my grandfather, so the night before the funeral I wrote something to
say at the funeral. When I stood up to make the speech many of the
people attending the funeral were surprised. Ever since I was little I had been a quiet, shy
girl. I didn't actually talk much at all to anybody I didn't know very well.
That had changed.
It's funny the way things work sometimes. The doctors predicted he wouldn't survive the weekend on Friday, March 2, 2001. My dad's
birthday was March 5. My grandfather's birthday was March 30. My mom's birthday was
April 1. My birthday was April 3. My grandparent's anniversary was April 4.
My grandfather passed away Saturday, April 7, 2001, the first day of the ten
days of spring break. It was amazing how he waited for all these birthdays
including one last for him and one last anniversary with my grandmother to
pass before he passed away.
My grandfather passing away affected more than friends and family. Four days before my grandfather passed away I finished my favorite class with my
favorite teacher out of my ten years of school. I had this class 3rd quarter. I had Miss Erb for theater. This class was an introduction into
acting. Not only does Miss Erb teach acting, but she has been in several plays. She is a very good actress. She taught this class well for her first
year of teaching. When this class started I would stand up in front of my
fellow class mates frozen, unable to get any words to come out. At the end
of this class I still wasn't good at doing anything in front of people, but I
had more confidence, and I didn't dread it as much. I wasn't that shy, quiet
girl anymore.
When I try to remember as far back as I can I remember helping my grandfather walk to where ever he was trying to go. He was blind
and had trouble with his legs, so he always needed help. This past summer before he
went into the nursing home permanently I was too lazy to help him. I always
pushed helping my grandfather onto my brother. After he passed away I was
thinking about how selfish I was by not helping. I felt so guilty, but there
was nothing I could do to change what I had done. This is when I realized
small things do matter in life.
These ten days were the hardest ten days of my life. My grandfather's funeral was three days after he passed away because Passover interfered. On
Sunday my parents, grandmother, uncle, and aunt made the arrangements for the
funeral. Since the funeral was grave side, the immediate family was given a
chance to see my grandfather one last time. Both my brother and I wanted to
see my grandfather one last time, so the seven of us headed up to the funeral
home. When I saw him it looked like he was bones covered by skin. He didn't
look like the same guy who watched me grow my whole life. I was holding my
brother when I noticed he looked a little pale, so I told my dad. My dad took him outside to get some fresh air, but on the way out I saw him fall to
the ground. He had been so upset over my grandfather he fainted. The day
after we saw my grandfather was the funeral. We spent the night of the funeral and the next two days sitting Shiva. The next four days we spent
trying to start getting used to not visiting him in the nursing home or
hospital. Every time I walked into my grandmother's house I walked over to the
chair he sat in all the time, but he wasn't there.
I had survived the entire spring break and I was glad to be back in school. As glad as I was to be back in school, I wasn't happy. I know
it is normal to be sad when someone close to you passes away, but I was upset
about something else also. All my friends told me how sorry they were to hear about my grandfather, but that didn't make me feel better. I told my
best friend Renee about how Miss Erb helped me. She had Miss Erb for theater
first quarter. As I was telling Renee about how Miss Erb helped me I realized I was telling the wrong person. I should be telling Miss Erb how I
felt.
This day is one I will never forget. Miss Erb's first block was next
door to my first block class. I walked in the classroom and asked to speak
to her privately. I told her about my grandfather passing away over spring
break. I told her about the speech and how I couldn't have done it, if she
hadn't taught theater as well as she did. As I told this to Miss Erb I could
feel the wet tears falling down my face. Her eyes were filled with tears.
She looked like she was about to cry. When I looked at her face I could tell
she understood what I was telling her. She told me how much this meant to
her.
I didn't know if Miss Erb would care or not that she helped me, but it
was worth it to take a chance. One thing I learned from my grandfather passing away was little things do matter in life. This was a little chance
to take, but since she did care it became bigger than I had thought. Every
time I see Miss Erb I think of the wonderful man my grandfather was. I will always be grateful
to her for helping me. I will never forget her.
In Loving Memory of David Daroff (1925-2001)
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